The trail of others pregnancies and births

Don't get me wrong I'm happy for ppl but I would be honest if I wasn't jealous when I hear peoples news that they are pregnant or their baby has been born. I can't help but think 'Hannah you should be here' 'why why why did you have to die'

My nephew was born yesterday. I can even bring myself to like the photo on Facebook. I don't want to receive notifications of people's congrats. I know I'm jealous, I don't get why I was the one this happened too. 

We are moving, deep down I think/know this is partly to escape but in reality I think it will be harder. Babies are born where ever you go but the mums I meet won't know about the sadness I carry with loosing Hannah. 

Miss you my precious little girl x 

Mile stones missed

Hannah would be 5 months now. She would be starting on solids, maybe even sitting up. She wouldn't be that tiny new born anymore! Guess think of missed mile stones isn't healthy but its hard not too. I can't even remember being pregnant with hannah. Feels like a distant dream....nightmare

My Grandma is an old lady at 97. She has done very well. Although her mind is strong her body is failing her and will wont be long till we say good bye. I will miss her. Se is a special lady who I love dearly. I like to imagine, when her time come that she will look after my Hannah. 

Lx