Three friends from school have popped or are about to pop in the next couple of weeks. It's hard. I wish so dearly I had baby Hannah. I wish I'd gone to the hospital and I'd arrived at exactly the right time and they had been able to deliver Hannah alive. I hate this so much. I hate she's not here . I feel so powerless. I was meant to look after you Hannah but that didn't happen and I'm so sorry. Our precious little one, I wish we could see you.
I know I need to battle against this sadness. My friend, obviously, have done nothing wrong. It's just very sad and it's my own battle to face.
Current things I need to face...
Step 1. Going to a baby shop to buy a gift
Step 2. Buying and writing a card
Step 3. Visiting them
Step 4. Holding their babies
Count those kick, worry about those odd tummy pains and pray like mad is my only advice. Sadly stillbirth does happen without warning and for no reason at all. Dont assume anything, and that is the devastating truth.
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